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:: Sunday, May 20, 2007 ::

When Harry met Voldy

It's been asserted that the one advantage Harry has over Lord Voldemort is the ability to love - therefore one might extrapolate that Harry uses "love" to overcome Lord Voldemort.

This certainly gives rise to many interesting possible endings...

More seriously, it might be a sacrifice on Harry's part in the name of love that defeats Lord Voldemort finally - very common plot device, this sacrifice thing. I don't need to give you examples. Maybe someone close to Harry dies to save his life. Maybe Harry dies to save someone's life. That would be interesting, though I am pretty sure this will lead to millions of voices suddenly crying out in terror, and then silenced by their grief...

Alternatively, this little scene popped into my head and made me laugh...

Harry eyed Lord Voldemort wearily as he took a long trembling breath. He had to do this... the time was right and if he delayed the truth any longer, it would be too late.

"Tom Riddle, I love you."

The Dark Lord staggered backwards, eyes rolling back into his head. His hands flailed at an unknown terror as he screamed: "No! No!"

Emboldened, Harry took a step forward and continued his assault. "Yes, it's true. We're meant to be together. You know that!"

Lord Voldemort threw his head back and screamed, the unearthly harmonics sending Death Eaters everywhere to their knees, crippled by the sound of their masters heart-rending cry. After what seemed like an eternity, he stopped and turned to the boy, hissing: "You can't possibly. I'm bleeding hideous! Look at my hips. I've got no eyebrows! No one will ever love me!"

"That's not true and you know it, Voldy. I've been yours ever since the day you gave me this scar."

Voldemort's face crumbled in a mixture of grief and longing. The hand holding his wand loosened, moving up to cover the glistening tears in his eyes.

With that, Harry leapt forward and wrapped Voldemort in a fierce hug, whispering to him huskily, "Shh, love. It's over. It's over. Don't fight any more."

Tearfully, Voldemort asked: "You don't think I'm fat then?"

To which, Harry gives the wrong answer because every man does (bespectacled teenage wizards are no exception), and Voldemort kills him. Heartbroken, he offs himself too by ODing on Prozac.

A bit slash fic, I know, but I still find it funny...

"I shall defeat you with the power of love!" - Sailor Moon (paraphrased)

Labels: Humour

:: And that's all she wrote 8:17 PM [+] ::
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