Bipolar Journalling:
How not to write a formal report / Left Out / Random Spambling / Everything dies / WTF / RIP Dan and Mitzi. I loved ya.http://drmcninja.com... / I am a D&D Geek. / Right to feel / A slightly less closed letter to TPL / Of disaster and dire straits. /
:: Wednesday, August 31, 2011 ::
30th August Dream draft
"I met him at a party. Someone's party. He was incredibly handsome, and that's why it surprised me when he smiled at me (in a rather smarmy fashion, I must admit) and pressed his attention on me in a bedroom later. There was an oddness to the manner in which he pursued me, which always felt calculated, with him expressing an ardour that did not match my attractiveness, far exceeding that which one would expect of a man of his good looks.
We were married some time later - the entire courtship process seemed a dream, more so that it was vague and hard to recollect than blissful and fantastical. Not long after, I found that I was pregnant with a son.
Time continued to pass in what I now felt was its usual fashion, and I had another son. The pregnancies left no impress on me, no emotional impact, though I did feel myself growing more and more wretched in this current state of affairs. I felt haggard and out of sorts, as if married life was sapping the energy from me.
I felt no joy towards being a mother or a wife - nothing at all, except a vague feeling of possessiveness towards my husband, who doted on his sons like any father would.
However, I knew that I would have to leave this marriage. I could not remain in it one moment longer. And then I saw you. I knew you would be my salvation."
The utter weariness on her face was a vivid illustration accompanying her tale of the suffering. I held her cold hands in mine, clutching them tightly. "Then we must help you leave this marriage. But what of the boys? Do you not care for them?" I asked with the faintest note of disapproval, allowing for her emotional fragility.
She shook her head mutely as we hurried towards her house. There, she suddenly stopped short, staring into the shadowed porch.
I saw the reason why. Standing there was a man, whom I assumed to be the husband, and next to him, two hunched figures. Two hunched, twisted figures of young children. I shuddered. There must be some genetic flaw in her husband, and this perhaps explained her apathy towards her offspring.
I girded my loins. There was nothing for it but to go ahead and explain firmly to the man that his wife needed to leave, at the very least for the moment, so that she could recover. She was a mere shadow of the woman I knew so many years ago in school and her fear upon seeing him only strengthened my resolve to dominate this surely bullying and abusive husband. I took a breath.
She grabbed my hands, engaging me, eyes desperate and pained when I turned to look at her. I bent to listen to what she had to say, rehearsing my reassurances and firm support for her leaving this marriage. In a choking whisper, she told me something that sent a chill down my spine.
"You must replace me."
He was advancing towards us, a smile on his face, as if coming to greet a friend. I found myself immobile, hands now trapped in inexplicably strong cold fingers. But what I saw in her eyes terrified me more. The sorrow she wore was not one of a friend who had betrayed. It was not the pain of someone who had butchered the trust of another.
It was the pain of a wife abandoned, the pleading, wistful look of someone who looked upon freedom as a bitter second place.
:: And that's all she wrote 12:18 AM [+] ::
2 comments
2 Comments:
quite a dream. pray tellt;is to be continued.
btw, nice work on WTF. getting tired of all the anonymous online tirades. irony noted.
that was intentionally unintentional.
sarius
Ah you. It's been a while. Glad to see you found your way back here?
Sadly, wrt this story, my dreams have a way of ending when I wake up. There is no continuation.
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